I've never experience SO much self doubt as I had going into this run. I nearly made myself sick about it on Friday! I was so worried I just couldn't make it, I'd have to make Becca leave me and drag/walk my sorry butt home. Confidence has been revived! Met Becca early at the JRP - well, she got a nap in waiting for ME because I was late - very late! I just underestimated the time it would take for me to get out the door, I'm used to going to the gym and not preparing fuel, water, breakfast etc before I go. Add having to feed baby before I go as well and yeah, just too much for 30 min lead time. We set off and after 2 miles I was ready to quit (wind, tired and bad mojo in the brain). Becca got me involved in a good conversation and I quickly got to forgetting about running and just enjoying it. We got to the turn around and I was afraid to look at my watch - I just knew it was going to say only 6 miles and not 9! I just knew it! Well, it was 8.5...acceptable. Grabbed some water and threw back a gu and we were off again. The way back is nice - more downhill and the wind at your back. I started losing it again about mile 13 (I think, again, I refused to look at how far we'd gone, I knew it would only bring disappointment). I just keep my eyes focused on the Lifetime roof where we could stop and get water and I could throw back another gu to finish out. I was happy to see when we got there we were at 15.5 - only 2.5 to go, I can do this...I CAN do this! The march back to the car wasn't all that pretty inside my head (or body, well, that was the story I was telling myself) but, I did it. Finished it off and although it was horribly slow for Becca I was pleased it was under a 9mm. I really thought I was going a LOT slower than that. I am glad to see I didn't lose much more than confidence over the 3 weeks I had to back off running, but it is a bit frustrating to try and come back when I have only 2 weeks left until I have to do my 'trainer' up in Ogden. Hopefully, my confidence comes back quickly. I got home and took a therapeutic ice bath - oh SO cold!!! But, my quad didn't bother me much at all during the run and doesn't bug too much now either. This is all good news to relate to my brain so that it will allow me to have confidence in my running. The KT tape didn't hurt either :) I'm grateful I had Becca to drag me out this morning, I think I probably would've chickened out otherwise, or just done 12 or 14. Thanks for keeping my mind away from itself today! AP: 8:52 splits: 9:08, 9:07, 9:05, 8:49, 8:47, 8:47, 8:50, 8:42, 8:49, 8:52, 9:07, 8:44, 8:48, 8:49, 8:41, 8:54, 8:56, 8:36 (nice to see the last is the fastest).
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